


Confidences in the Dark

by Toshi_Nama



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 23:04:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13891014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toshi_Nama/pseuds/Toshi_Nama





	Confidences in the Dark

The conversation in the house had gone too many directions.  I slipped on my boots before filling a plate for myself. “I’ll be just outside.” Too many whipsawing emotions.

With the sun down, the air was turning crisp – Nathaniel was right, it felt like the false summer we’d been enjoying was over. Not enough to go back in and get a cloak, though. Just enough to be a pleasant contrast to the warmth inside the House. I watched the first moonrise peek between the trees, and leaned against the corner, out of sight of the windows. I took a bite of the pie – definitely Ella’s cooking, the seasoning was perfect. And sighed.

Cassandra came out not long after, with a plate of her own and a full tankard. “Here.”

I balanced my fork and took a drink as she found a matching position against the wall, close enough to pass the cider back and forth, far enough for solitude.

“It was Leliana, wasn’t it.” Not even a question, not really. Quiet, as all our conversations alone in the dark had been, over the long years. We’d discovered that solitude together helped, allowed us to drop some of the barriers we’d both learned to raise.

I heard her sigh. “I didn’t want to ask, and find out for certain. Likely, certainly.” She took a bite, then the tankard when I offered it back to her. “One of Alrik’s protégés or contemporaries, but smart enough to stay just inside Chantry law.”

The darkness hid my wince. I remembered Alrik, his cruelty…my uncomfortable gratitude when Sabah had killed him. The investigation Meredith ordered, then quickly closed as the details started coming forward, as the younger Templars began to look sick and appreciative he was gone. ‘A tragic accident’ was the official finding. Yes, tragically stabbed seventeen times, and still smoking when we’d found him.

“I remember Alrik.”

“And the fact the Seekers saw no reason to re-open an obviously falsified investigation should have told you something.”

 _It did tell me something. It watered those seeds of doubt, of horror…but they didn’t sprout quickly enough to save what I’d been sworn to protect._ “So this Stefan?”

“The same, but clever. As best we could tell, he would terrorize the mages and even younger Templars. Failed Harrowings and requests for Tranquility went up.”

 _‘_ _Stefan. The look in his eyes, the bruises he’d leave where they wouldn’t show… He took Rodie away, did you know?’_ The hopeless, helpless way she’d told him that, when Dorian’s horror had actually worked on her. The last time I’d ever heard his name, though I’d told it to Leliana shortly after. I set my fork on my plate, suddenly having a hard time eating, and ran my free hand through my hair.

Cassandra glanced over. “Drink, Cullen.”

A long moment, and a long drink later, I spoke. “At least he is dead, and can harm no one else.” She ate quietly while I pondered the evening, the memories. While I tried to step away from the horror of what Fey had gone through, and her failing to protect…Rodie.

“Rodie. Maferath’s balls, I never thought to mention him.”

“Who?” Cassandra choked slightly, then swallowed the last bite.

How to answer without breaking a confidence…I couldn’t figure out a way. But this was important to her, had been important enough to risk her brother’s wrath as a young woman. “Rodie. Once, Fey mentioned a Rodie that she protected from Stefan, who took him away. Probably a mage, likely went to White Spire at first. I assume a shortened form of his name, but it’s all I have. Given how she spoke of him, a cousin or brother.” I sighed. “I was told in confidence, Cassandra.” I took another drink as she ate and thought, then noticed how little was left. I handed it back to her, and worked more on my dinner.

“I understand. Inquiries and research will be discreet.”

“It doesn’t change the fact I broke the confidence, but I appreciate it.” Tipped my head back to look at the stars, starting to shine through. Time to find a different topic, especially since the cider was a bit stronger than I’d realized, now that I was moving my head. “You...and Nathaniel?”

A disgusted noise. I quirked my lips, remembering how many times I had heard that sound over the years.

“You deserve happiness, Seeker. I’ll say nothing more.”

“It is not that easy, Cullen. He…and I…yes. And expect no more on _that._ But for the rest, it is challenging. I have so many duties to the Chantry, to the Seekers…and he has his own.”

I saw movement: it was Fey, Shadow at her heels, coming back. Her movements were long and easy, so she had worked through most of it. She didn’t see us, just opened the door and went in. Cassandra glanced over, drank again as she saw I wasn’t moving. We stood in silence longer, as Cassandra set the now-empty tankard at her feet, eating.

“Yes, duty. It drives both of us, doesn’t it, Seeker?” We both sighed.

“Do you regret that you accepted the position as Right Hand?”

I raised an eyebrow, unseen. But these talks, the unspoken rule was honesty. “At times. It has been hard, with Fey pregnant, and now Camilla. But I cannot think of anyone else who could have stopped the chaos in the Hunterfells for you. No one else would have had the connections you needed.” I sighed again. “Besides, you took a more challenging set of responsibilities. After all you had done for me, how could I abandon you when you asked?”

This time, she made a sound I couldn’t recognize, quickly cut off. I pushed off the wall and took a step closer, to where I could see her eyes in the moonlight, but she looked away. I did something I’d never done – I reached out, touched her chin, gently turned her face back to me…and what I saw punched me in the gut. I closed my eyes. _Shit. Blast it all, I had no idea, never realized…_ When I opened mine again, I saw the warning that flared in hers.

Neither of us were sober enough for this – which is perhaps why it happened, why she failed to hide it this time. I searched inside, and found what I always had: friendship, respect…even love, for a sister, a shield-partner. I was still holding her chin, so I leaned forward and kissed her cheek. “I wouldn’t abandon you now, Seeker. We fixed a hole in the sky – we can fix the Chantry and the Order.” I carefully leaned down to pick up the tankard, and headed back inside.


End file.
